DSM-5 and me. Relationships.
- Callie Shumaker
- Jan 22
- 2 min read
DSM-5 and me series two of nine. Relationships.
A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation
Working through therapy and working on myself, this one isn’t a huge barrier anymore. Anyone from my past can tell you that it used to be though.
Throughout my teen years I struggled a lot with this. I would find someone that I liked and they ruled the world. There was no one more perfect. They could do no wrong. And it was almost immediate.
Then came the extreme devaluation. This would be caused by something as simple as not reciprocating affection in the way that I wanted. They became public enemy number one. The worst person ever. I became distant and ghosted.
It’s crazy how fast the process was. And I did it over and over.
I even did it to my husband when we were teenagers.
Through working on myself, his patience, and me realizing that I was worthy of what love truly was, we are here now.
God bless that man’s patience. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Patience of a saint.
If you have BPD really step back and analyze if you do this. I honest to goodness did not know I was doing this until I was an adult and thought back when learning about my BPD diagnosis. I thought that is how normal relationships were supposed to be.
My family did their best at the time trying to bring it to light, but I was trapped in the BPD relationship cycle.
Really think about it and talk to your therapist about what you can do to break the cycle. I had a the best man in the world in front of me that I had hurt many times in my cycle and I was about to lose him forever. That did it for me.
Everyone's journey is different.
Just stay mentally, emotionally, and physically safe until you break your cycle. I believe in you.
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